Tuesday, February 23, 2010

♫ Single Mom Song ... that's Bogus.

The song is bogus...if you made a decision for your kiddo(s). Not you. Not him. Not anybody else.

An outright confession:

When I first heard this song (months and months ago), it just six months after I had left. It was March of 2009. My gut churned, and flipped, and got sad all over again. It made me feel really guilty. It made me explode from the inside out over "breaking up a family", again. I knew I didn't belong back there...I always knew that. But it made me sick to think that I took my girls away from something good.

And then, after a few emails between friends, prayers; on my knees, tears, and going over my notes from counseling, I realized a few things.

Things:

*Nobody should or would leave a guy like Jason Michael Carroll. See, he's handsome, he's rich, he's romantic, and obviously, he wants to be a good daddy (if all lyrics are true).

This song is crap.

Anybody that has a man that's an amazing daddy...has a good thing that they wouldn't leave. They wouldn't deprive a GOOD DAD of his rights, his time.

I made the right choice.

All the things I had to do when I heard this song...I had to do before I chose to leave. I leaned hard on friends. I prayed; on my knees, a LOT. I cried for my girls. I spent hours and days in counseling.

Single mamma's...never ever doubt your reasons. Always put your children first. And never settle for less than what they deserve. If you do that, all the pieces...including the right guy...will come along.



Yours Truly,
Nomz

4 comments:

Lover of your BLOG! said...

You are an amazingly strong mother.

Your past life changing decisions and your gut feelings are your own. No one has walked in your shoes, so no one should judge you - EVER.

Keep on - keeping on Nomz!

P.S. Great song...

Anonymous said...

Mistakes are just potential for new discovery!

You are an amazing woman and terrific mother, and you just keep getting better every day!
Chin up! Love ya!

Reese said...

You know, while I don't have any kids, nor have I been married, I can say this much:

Just because a guy is a great dad, doesn't mean he's a great significant other.

He produced those offspring. Of course there will be some sort of love always there for them (give or take the strength of the emotion).

However, he can fall in and out of love with you.

If it didn't work for you, you know your kids would have noticed honey! Then they would have been affected too.

What you did might (and may still) suck for the present, you've completely prevented your darling girls' futures from being filled with not-so-hot emotions.

And THAT is what makes a good mom a GREAT mom :) I'm proud you care so much! (and you best be around whenever mini reeses decide to run around... I'ma need loads of help!)

Candy said...

Nomz...

You are truly an amazing woman! Choosing to make a better life for you and your girls is not a fault. I have to agree with Reese... Would you rather your girls know the true sense of the word love? Or would you rather stick in a situation with no love for the sake of the girls? And what does this teach them.

You are a fountain of strength and love for your girls! They will realize that as they get older.

Use your trust in god and your gut instincts. Neither will steer you wrong.

Candy
PS - I hate that song too!!! I prefer the following:

http://music.aol.com/video/the-strong-one/clint-black/1976776

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