♫ Men Will Be Men

Your attention please! Fine print: The picture above may or may not represent the average man. It was simply put there to capture your attention long enough to get you here to read something BY a man. TaDa!

You may have read my completely awesome post about how Girls Will Be Girls. It was mildly hilarious, totally entertaining, and 100% truth. Read it here if you'd like! Girls Will Be Girls.

That link should open a new window for you, so you can click right back to this one! Brilliant bloggers=we iz them.

One of our readers, a man I'm safely assuming, left a comment. And it rocked so hard I'm posting it as it's own blog. Little did you know, anonymous commenters, that you might be ghost blogs, eh?.

I'm still completely clueless who this was, but OH how I love thee.

Men Will be Men

*We love you, even when we forget to say it.
*We love sports, the outdoors, and bigger, more powerful (every) things.
*Having sex IS saying I love you.
*We forget. Every. Little. Thing.
*We like war, sports, blood & gore & action movies, and will never admit to crying at chick flicks.
*We will burp and fart at the most inopportune times.
*We'll always drive faster, better (in our own minds), to make up for the time waiting for you - even if we get lost getting there.
*We brag about you to our friends & co-workers, even if we forget to do it in front of you.
*We will forgive AND forget.
*We adore you.
*We'll protect you, and our babies.
*We can't live without you.
*We love you. Always. Forever.

I hope I can remember this tomorrow...

A man.

♫ Why Do Women...

It’s all too common, hanging around a group of guys, to hear their wishes of wanting to understand women. I grew up mostly tom boy, grew in to a girl that was a tom boy crazy about boys, and now, a girl with a boy who has a great group of guy friends. It seems most of my life the majority of my friends close to me are male…and it seems that no matter which direction I go, these are the questions they’re dying to know the answers to. I can’t answer all of them, I can only try. Maybe, female readers, you could help me out. Or help them out, actually. Men…if you have any questions for us, ask. The blog allows anonymous comments, so we won’t even tell your manly friends that you’re reading a blog and asking our advice. ;)

#1. Why do women search for bad boys…or prefer jerks, over ones that treat them right?

You know, it’s a mystery, to be completely honest. For some reason we are attracted to the bad boys. The jerks. The assholes. The ones that treat us like crap. Because the one guy that treats us good, will probably leave us…and it’ll hurt more. It’s so much easier to love a jerk, because it’s easier to hate a jerk. While we desire that fairytale romance that we read in all our books and watch on all our movies, we also learn from a few broken hearts, that there are very few men out there worth the pain. Women also have a poor self image, generally, and like to find guys that agree with that-rather than tell us otherwise. We have so little faith in ourselves, that we have to find it in somebody else that gives us attention-even if it’s not the right kind of attention.

Look around. I think you’ll notice the trend…while good girls are attracted to the jerks, it seems the nice guys are attracted to the manipulating crappy women. Opposites attract, I’d say.

#2. Why are women emotional?

Isn’t it frustrating that when you do something really great you get tears, and when we’re mad…you get tears, and when we’re upset you get tears? Or how you can joke around about our looks one day, and it offends us the next? Or how we never forget anything? God granted us the ability to bear your children. Lucky you, that means every month we have the ability to get pregnant. Whether we actually are trying to or not, that one time a month comes that makes our emotions static-like. Everything is fuzzy, and pokey, and very, very sensitive. Most of the time, even though it usually lasts 7-10 days, the emotional part of it only lasts about five. So five days a month, prepare yourself for one mess of a girl, gents. Forgive us, love us anyway. It’s not like it’s our choice to go through that. Also? If you’re with a girl long enough, you’ll figure out when it’s gonna hit, this storm cloud of emotions, and you can plan around it.

“Every woman is wrong until she cries, and then she is right - instantly. ~Sam Slick (Thomas Chandler Haliburton)”

“They call it PMS because Mad Cow Disease was already taken. ~Author Unknown “

#3. Why do women wear thongs?

I hate this question. Because even I don’t know why we wear thongs. If I had to guess? Some guy probably told a few women they looked sexy in them, and BLAM, we’re all sexy. But we’re not, are we? :} It’s nice to be able to wear them and have no lines in your pants…other than that, there is no benefit, and no matter what any girl tells you, they’re NOT comfortable. We do it mostly for your sake. Thank everything Victoria Secret is making more and more comfortable panties that are not floss-shaped.

#4. Why do women keep friends, that aren’t friends?

Frenemies. You know, I planned on writing a whole blog on this topic-but due to some sensitivity, it was difficult to write without pointing fingers. I can’t even count how many times I’ve been asked ”How can you be friends with somebody that treats you like THAT? We’re emotional, loving creatures. We were born with a motherly instinct…and even when we’re not mothers, we want to care for everybody. Mean people need love too, and that’s why God made women. To make sure everybody had somebody. So when you notice that your girlfriend has a friend that takes more than she gives, that doesn’t seem to notice the effort that your girl puts in to the friendship, that constantly runs her over with a big metaphorical truck-leaving you with a flatter-than-a-pancake girlfriend, just remember to love your epically awesome girl for being the girl that she is-rather than focusing on the big tough inside man that wants to run her friend over with the same truck, only better. Every girl has a “friend” that is horrible to her. We like the punishment a little bit, I’ll admit it. Plus, we feel like good people for loving people in spite of themselves. All we ask is that you continue to pick us back up when our we’ve had enough, and encourage us to keep on keepin’ on.

Good song to make your Frenemies listen to:



“There is a special place in hell for women who do not help other women. ~Madeleine K. Albright “

#5. Why do women play hard-to-get?

We like to be chased. Somewhere in growing up, we get lessons on how to score THAT GUY. One of those rules? Play hard to get…because girls like to feel chased, needed, wanted…and guys like the challenge. Time has proven that some girl made that up. Girls DO want all those things, most guys hate the challenge of the chase. Guys like a challenge like the following conversation on a bar:

”What are you drinking?”
“It’s a secret…if you guess, we’ll dance.”

NOT this conversation:

”What are you drinking?”
“EFFF OFF”

Men like a flirty challenge…not a battle to the deaths to get your number. Girls LIKE to be chased. Hard. They need to feel needed.

I think I could write a blog a day on the women’s psychy…but I won’t. Because then I take the mystery out of things. That…and women are so unpredictable that this doesn’t even apply to all of us. It’s a good place to start though.

A few quotes:

Women cannot complain about men anymore until they start getting better taste in them. ~Bill Maher

A woman can say more in a sigh than a man can say in a sermon. ~Arnold Haultain

Women get the last word in every argument. Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument. ~Author Unknown

The rarest thing in the world is a woman who is pleased with photographs of herself. ~Elizabeth Metcalf

If a woman has to choose between catching a fly ball and saving an infant's life, she will choose to save the infant's life without even considering if there are men on base. ~Dave Barry

Yours Truly,
Nomz