Monday, July 20, 2009

**Men are Hunters Woman are Gatherers.

A letter from one of our ghost bloggers:

Today I try my hand at blogging. I have never done this before, but in the past months I have had a very inspirational person come into my life.

You see I’m a mom getting to watch her children grow up and go through lives ups and downs, and there struggle in finding that Mr. or Mrs. Right.

I was asked a week or so ago if I believed that there is that “special one” for everyone, and if so how do you know. Well from someone who has been with my wonderful husband for 21+ years. I can honestly say the following.

Yes there is that “special one” for everyone, we just have to pick through the bad ones to get that great one. We also have to work at keeping that one special. I can say from personal experience that its hard work and there is no one way to make it work. But if you take some things and keep them in the back of your mind it can make those times when we think we are at the end of the road we all of a sudden get a new path to take with that special person.

First off you have to go back to the very basics of the human (animal ) race.

1. In every species on earth and every relationship there is an Alfa person. Sometimes it’s the guy and sometimes it’s the girl. What matters is that you know witch one you are. There can not be two Alfas in one relationship. When you find out were you are in the so called pecking order it will make many things go easier.

2. Men are hunters and Woman are gathers: This goes for many things in life. You see Men are made to think they should be the providers, protectors. They tend to have one track minds in most that they do. They tend not to be able to multi task. Woman on the other hand are gathers, we open arms and gather all we can in. We are touchers. If we go shopping we like to touch, feel, look, and admire all we can. When we are troubled we tend to want to gather our girls and all the info we can around us.

3. I was once told by a very wise women after a long road trip with my husband and being frustrated that we had hardly talked the whole trip. That men only have about 2500 words a day to use. We woman on the other hand have a endless amount. As you scratch your head and wonder what I’m talking about stop and think about the last time you spent several hours just the two of you together. Who did most of the talking. Its us woman. And there is nothing wrong with that. What we have to realize is that next time your trapped in a pick up truck traveling down the interstate for hours at a time. The man isn’t going to tend to do a lot of talking. We will carry 80% of the conversation. Best thing you can do is learn to do something else to take your mind off of the silence.

4. The last thing I can add that will help is. Remember to save time for the two of you. You see your children will grow up and leave the nest and you will be left looking at that person you married so many years ago and think who is this person. By taking time for each other you will grow together instead of apart. Because lets face it none of use are the same person we were all those years ago when we walked done the aisle. If you cant see how each other is growing and changing then when the kiddos are gone you will look at each other one day and think who is this person I call my spouse. So take a few days or a week what ever you can spear every year and rediscover who that “special person” is. It will be the best thing you can do. Don’t get me wrong we should dedicate our selves to our children but a few days or a week every now and then isn’t going to make our children screwed up. Just the opposite. It will help them when there time comes around.

Ok I have blabbed enough. Probably way to much. Hope this is helpful to all of you in your young love stage or even those who have hit a rocky patch. Thanks for reading.

**Ghost Blogger


Anonymous said...

Great advice for sure! long as you have a wonderful spouse that wants to try as hard as you. You sound blessed in your long relationship...congrats to you!

I on the other hand wish I had a spouse that looked forward to living and loving forever together. My spouse is more worried about drinking, sleeping and not being an active part in a team effort.

Thanks for the ghost blog...wonderful advice

Sazaran said...

Fantastic advice!! How in the world did I miss this blog?? I agree with every point and I agree that, including a Foundation which is God alone, they can help make a marriage successful if practiced from day one.

Personally, mah hubby and I need to work on our "alone" time. Not talking about sex, per se. But, just spending time together. Because, it's true, when you have a kid it changes everything.

Thanks Guest Blogger! :)

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