Thursday, March 18, 2010

♫ How to make yourself UNhappy

It’s all too easy to talk about happiness, how to obtain it. How to be peaceful from the inside out. It’s harder to talk openly about what makes a person unhappy. It’s hard, sometimes, to even admit that you’re unhappy in order to move on to happy. What I’m hoping with this blog, mostly, is for people to realize when they’re in that place, and how to change one thing at a time to make those feelings go away.

So, below is a list. A list of things that make people UNhappy. Feel free to print the list out, check off the ones that you are, and find a way to reverse it.

*Be completely and totally wrapped up in a guy.

Who needs self worth and independence, right? It might feel like complete bliss…until you hit a point where you fully understand what alone feels like.

*Eat very unhealthily

If it tastes good, eat it. It will have little effect on you…aside from poor health, dry skin, wrinkled skin, faster aging process, breaking down from the inside out. Of course, you don’t have to eat healthy all the time, but eating out for every meal, not watching what you eat, what time you eat, how many snacks you consume, or how much alcohol you intake, has serious long term affects that any surgery, pill, or program will never be able to reverse.

*Talk about everybody else, a lot

It’s completely unavoidable to talk about other people. Gossip is in our nature, especially if we’re female. But if the only two things you are able to bring up in conversation is the weather, or another person…you’re forever going to live in jealousy and negativity. For every negative thing you notice in somebody else’s life, try to find one positive. I mean at least that girl you can’t stand has adorable hair, right?

*Pretend like everything is ok, all the time

Pretend your entire life has windows. Now pretend that your windows are open all the time. What would they see? Would they see what you’re portraying your Facebook and Twitter account? Or would they hardly recognize you? Of course, life comes with blinds that you can pull down every now and then to protect what’s yours, but putting on a false image to make yourself feel better is a much different thing than privacy.

*Surround yourself by negative people

Talk constantly about what you don’t have, how terrible it is that you’re stuck in the same grind every single day, and that nobody ever notices how much you’re accomplishing. Or…surround yourself by people that challenge you to try harder, to make some changes, and encourage you on days that you’re down. Having friends that agree with your misery really aren’t friends at all. They’re just throwing mud in to your already deep enough hole.

*Ignore the little things, they don’t really matter anyway

Little things are just that, right? They’re so small that they don’t add up to the weight on your shoulders or even come close to lessening it. Then again, maybe the little things are there to get us through the hard times. They might be the pebbles we have to step on in order to cross the mountain in front of us.

Confession: I’m an optimistic person. But once I get on a rant and a roll, it’s hard to sway me otherwise. I let things get under my skin, and then I whine profusely about them until I feel better. Which usually outlasts my toddlers' tantrums. I’m working on finding a way around dwelling on things, around being moody, and around throwing tantrums internally. The above, are all things I’ve personally dealt with, and found a way to turn around.

Please feel free to use our anonymous comment ability to tell us your short-comings, how we can pray for you, or what challenges you’re facing lately. Life isn’t easy, but you don’t have to make it harder.

Yours Truly,


Anonymous said...

Great blog Nomz! I agree with everything you've written.

OMG...I do my best to surround myself with positive people, not be known as the gossip girl, deal with my feelings on my own (example: if I don't like something, I don't complain, I do what it takes to make it all better in MY mind, MY world), no FB or Twitter postings, no begging for someones attention and certainly - I take care of myself!

I am #1 in my life. If I'm not 'ok', then neither are my friends. My friends don't deserve to ride my bumpy roller coaster when I'm riding either I keep to myself or I do whatever it takes to make ME & my feelings better!

-Good song too!

Sazaran said...

I'll admit it, the whole healthy thing is my vice. I love junk, sweet and carbs. It's time to kick the bad habit, methinks.

Anonymous said...

NOMZ thank you so much for this blog. I have a certain friend that needs lots of prayer. She has nothing good to say about anything or anybody right now. I want her in my life, but what I don't want is the negative vibes. I'm trying to be happy as can be right now. How can I help a friend get positive again? Or was she pretending the whole time I thought she was a positive person? I know we all hit bumps, and I know you can't be happy all the time. I think it takes more energy to be angry and hurtful then peaceful and happy. Thoughts???

Nomz said...

Anonymous...sorry it took so long for me to get back to you!

Support your friend. Really, all you can worry about is if you're doing the right things in your life to keep creating positive energy, no matter what your friends are up to. Everybody goes through rough patches. We all heal from them differently, and in our own what seems like eternity since your positive friend was around, it might only feel like seconds to her in her misery, you know? Hang with her, create positive reinforcements, and make yourself #1 :)


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