♫ Texting Etiquette

You know those contracts you have to sign with your phone carriers? The kind that say ”You are OURS for two years, and you don’t get any new cool phone unless you agree to TWO MORE years!”?? I really think that in that contract, there should be a few rules of etiquette. Both texting, and phone. Today, we’re going to cover what was left out of the texting section of your contract, both good and bad…because you know, etiquette has its good side too.

Can I get a booooooo, hisssssss?! The things below are things that drive your friends crazy. Please cease and desist as soon as possible:

#1. When someone obviously takes quite a bit of time to write you something creative, unique, interesting, or at least substantial, please do not respond with a one word answer…or worse, a one letter answer.

Examples: “K”. “LOL”.

#2. When somebody texts you something that requires a response, and you think it’s going to take hours or even days to think about? Don’t take hours or days to respond.

Example: “Hey, do you want to go out tomorrow night?” Invalid response: silence.
Instead: “Hey, do you want to go out tomorrow night?” Awesome response: I’m busy right now, I’ll text you when I know for sure!

#3. When you’re at a movie, at dinner with friends or on a date, at dinner, or are in mid-conversation with another person: DO NOT be texting excessively at the same time. It’s rude. It’d be like having a conversation with somebody in the room while you’re on the phone with somebody else.

#4. If somebody texts something similar to the following in the response to “what are you doing?”…:

Getting ready to head in to a movie!
Just sat down to dinner!
Getting ready to go to bed!
Enjoying some quiet time
I’m super busy!

…don’t continue to text them. Say something to the affect of ”Have a great time!” and drop it. Do not send more than two texts asking how it’s going, where they are, how the food is, what movie they’re in, etc. And don’t get offended if you get no response at all. Generally, it means they’re busy.

#5. If you’re worth a group of friends, laughing out loud at a text you got, then quickly putting it away is rude. Try your best not to laugh out loud, or cuss, or throw your phone, unless you’re prepared to share the news.

#6. The following responses are “enders” to a conversation:

Have a great night!
I will let you know as soon as I get a chance!
My phone is about to die…

Meaning, following it up with more conversation isn’t the preferred direction. If you have something that’s going to take more than five texts to say, call the person up rather than texting.

#7. Don’t text somebody saying ”Call me.” YOU CALL ME, and leave a message if I don’t answer. Voicemail is not yet a thing of the past.

#8. Don’t say: ”I’m having a bad day. But I don’t want to talk about it.” as an opener. It leaves the person on the other end in full awkward.

Can I get a Yaaaaaaaaaaaaay! And round of claps?!?! The things below are things people LOVE to get via text:

#1. People love when you come across something funny, intriguing, or random and think of them to spread the word!

Example: Dude, this guy in front of me at checkout has the coolest Perm-Mullet I have ever seen, and is totally buying Depends!

#2. Small updates via text are welcome, rather than a phone call. Let’s face it, we’re unsocial after socializing most of the day. An update like I can’t wait to see you tomorrow! is so much better than dealing with a whole conversation.

#3. It’s awesome to get a response. Period. Even if it’s just Thank you for texting me, I’ll get back to you when I’m less busy!

#4. Everybody loves pictures. Pictures of anything. Send pictures! Also? When you get a picture message of something random, people love responses to their brilliant pictures. They took the effort to make sure the picture was perfect, and send it to you, and a response is sooooooooo exciting!

#5. When you’re with another person, and see something that you can’t say out loud-text it! Secret texts are secretly super exciting. Do NOT laugh out loud though. See above rules.

Example: This karaoke singer is terrible! It allows you to have a little laugh, without offending the person singing.

Curious, what are your texting pet peeves and joys?



Yours Truly,
Nomz