♥The List

For those of you who've seen P.S. I Love You, you will be familiar with the following qualities Denise kept to when searching for Mr. Right:

Denise Hennessey: Are you single?
Guy with Clipboard: Yes.
Denise Hennessey: Are you gay?
Guy with Clipboard: Yes.
[Denise walks away]
Denise Hennessey: [a few frames later] Are you single?
Ted: Yes.
Denise Hennessey: Are you gay?
Ted: No.
Denise Hennessey: Are you working?
Ted: No.
[she walks away]

In fact, there are several movies in which the starry-eyed girl holds a piece of paper to her heart and prays that her list will personify in the form of tall, dark and handsome.

Years ago, in my virginal pre-teen era, I had a list of qualities that I wanted in my "future husband". I can't remember every detail, but I know the list was pretty ridiculously picky. Then, a friend of mine said to me, "Sarah, you'll never find someone if you can't give 'em a little slack." So I tore up the list and, well, fast-forward 10 years and we all know how that chapter ended.

Just this minute, I read a friend's list and felt that little spark re-light in my heart. Why don't I deserve every detail I want, dangit?! Of course, there is no such thing as perfection, but I've learned which characteristics are priority and which are not. It might take a little longer for this person to take their cue and enter my main stage of life, but why settle for less than what the heart yearns for?

Here it is:

* You must be a Christian. A passionate Christian. All luke-warm applicants will be denied.
* You must accept my son as your own and also want to have more children- with me. Duh.
* Please be taller than me (easy to do, I know). However, I need to cut it off at six feet.
* You must be able to balance your work life, social life and home life with skill. Any one cannot take precedence over the other.

* Romance, dear, and affection.. 'Nuf said.

* Humor. You will have me wrapped around your pinky if you can get me to laugh frequently.

* If you do drugs (this includes cigarettes), you will be booted out the door by my pointy pink pumps.

* A kind heart; I do not do well with someone who makes fun of others for sport. In fact, if your sense of humor is cutting, don't even talk to me.

Brownie Points for the following:

* Coinciding political views. I am Conservative. Beware.

* Love of traveling.

* A degree in any area which will allow you to provide for your family.

* You take pride in your appearance and hygiene.

* A firm handshake says alot about a person.

* My friends like you and vice versa. Double brownie points, for this one.

There ya go. Looking over this, I'd say I'm pretty easy-going. No requirements that resemble Edward Cullen. Now... all I need is a little patience.

-Sazaran