I have a bone to pick (surprise, surprise).
It seems that out of nowhere, the availability and tolerance of pornography has erupted and left its mess all over our country. I do not watch porn, nor do I agree with those who think it is harmless. Here is why I must take a stand against such diabolical entertainment:
Pornography victimizes women and children. The stories that I have heard, which will not be shared on this blog, are ones that force nightmares for weeks. They are the stories that leave such a lasting, horrific image in the mind's eye that ignorance is impossible. Why would one human being take another and force their will on them- a will that is so disruptive and degrading? Not all women and certainly no children volunteer to be molested, violated and cheapened for entertainment. Entertainment? Really? We should be ashamed.
Pornography causes an unrealistic view of "perfection". How could a normal woman, especially one who has borne children, see a porn star and think she could ever measure up? Her breasts are not shaped as such, her lips are not falsely plumped, her stretch marks are evident and her attitude is not "do anything you want to me- moremoremore". A man who watches pornography is sending his girlfriend/wife a message that says, this is what turns me on. Once a woman realizes that she is not enough, her entire idea of pleasure, intimacy and trust are compromised. It ends up being a violent domino effect- not one good thing will result from trying to be like "her".
Pornography is the root of all sexual crime. In my opinion. I have no proof to back this up. However, each case that I have come across in my personal life has a common denominator: porn. It starts off innocent enough: a little peak here and there; then it escalates to more, hard-core, nothing satisfies. It ends with a rape, or a pedophilia desire.
Pornography perverts the mindset. Have you ever been around someone who just cannot get their mind out of the gutter? They seems to slip a "that's what she said" joke into every little window of opportunity- be it appropriate or not. Sure, at first it's something to snigger at but after a while, a gutter-mind can be exhausting.
Pornography is expensive. Now, I know nothing about the actual costs of it. I do know this: people go into debt. Quickly. "In this economy" we have higher priorities.
"Pornography intensifies an individual's drive to serve oneself, rather than serve others." It's all about how can you fulfill my desires? And not let us enter into this together and share an experience that we will both enjoy.
Whether it is porn for personal pleasure, education or entertainment I want to beseech you to stop the band wagon and proclaim purity. Sex is a personal and private act that should be between a man and a woman who have committed themselves to one another. No one else is permitted to be an audience to such intimacy. Parents, set standards and control the avenues to pornography. What perception is available for an adolescent who knows nothing of the complications of intercourse? How will he/she be ready, when the time comes, to have a right attitude about an act meant only for a mature mind?
Philippians 4:8
Whatever is true, whatever is worthy of reverence and is honorable and seemly, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely and lovable, whatever is kind and winsome and gracious, if there is any virtue and excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think on and weigh and take account of these things [fix your minds on them].
It seems that out of nowhere, the availability and tolerance of pornography has erupted and left its mess all over our country. I do not watch porn, nor do I agree with those who think it is harmless. Here is why I must take a stand against such diabolical entertainment:
Pornography victimizes women and children. The stories that I have heard, which will not be shared on this blog, are ones that force nightmares for weeks. They are the stories that leave such a lasting, horrific image in the mind's eye that ignorance is impossible. Why would one human being take another and force their will on them- a will that is so disruptive and degrading? Not all women and certainly no children volunteer to be molested, violated and cheapened for entertainment. Entertainment? Really? We should be ashamed.
Pornography causes an unrealistic view of "perfection". How could a normal woman, especially one who has borne children, see a porn star and think she could ever measure up? Her breasts are not shaped as such, her lips are not falsely plumped, her stretch marks are evident and her attitude is not "do anything you want to me- moremoremore". A man who watches pornography is sending his girlfriend/wife a message that says, this is what turns me on. Once a woman realizes that she is not enough, her entire idea of pleasure, intimacy and trust are compromised. It ends up being a violent domino effect- not one good thing will result from trying to be like "her".
Pornography is the root of all sexual crime. In my opinion. I have no proof to back this up. However, each case that I have come across in my personal life has a common denominator: porn. It starts off innocent enough: a little peak here and there; then it escalates to more, hard-core, nothing satisfies. It ends with a rape, or a pedophilia desire.
Pornography perverts the mindset. Have you ever been around someone who just cannot get their mind out of the gutter? They seems to slip a "that's what she said" joke into every little window of opportunity- be it appropriate or not. Sure, at first it's something to snigger at but after a while, a gutter-mind can be exhausting.
Pornography is expensive. Now, I know nothing about the actual costs of it. I do know this: people go into debt. Quickly. "In this economy" we have higher priorities.
"Pornography intensifies an individual's drive to serve oneself, rather than serve others." It's all about how can you fulfill my desires? And not let us enter into this together and share an experience that we will both enjoy.
Whether it is porn for personal pleasure, education or entertainment I want to beseech you to stop the band wagon and proclaim purity. Sex is a personal and private act that should be between a man and a woman who have committed themselves to one another. No one else is permitted to be an audience to such intimacy. Parents, set standards and control the avenues to pornography. What perception is available for an adolescent who knows nothing of the complications of intercourse? How will he/she be ready, when the time comes, to have a right attitude about an act meant only for a mature mind?
Philippians 4:8
Whatever is true, whatever is worthy of reverence and is honorable and seemly, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely and lovable, whatever is kind and winsome and gracious, if there is any virtue and excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think on and weigh and take account of these things [fix your minds on them].
Posts
38 comments:
Very brave and a much needed blog. Human Trafficking is one of the largest crimes in and outside the US. It exploits women, children, girls and their lives are never the same, whether they get out alive or not. The only way to stop Human Trafficking is to educate and stop the MEN that initiate it, for financial gain.
I am not sure how many men will end up reading this blog. I can only hope that they take the time to be educated. Thanks for tackling such a difficult topic!! - Jay
The saddest thing for me is that these women are not being forced to do this out of fear of violence but out of necessity or greed. Either case is a horrible situation and the former is inexcusable but they are doing this for money, plain and simple. They are being paid, very well I am sure, to do these acts. What kind of message does that send? How is this any different than prostitution, and how is it legal in that regard? because the government can tax it?
I am a man and disagree 100%.
1st Glamour Magazines gives women a false sense of perfection. I never heard a young women say she wants to look like a porn star. Glamour Magazines are more detrimental to a girls preception of what perfection is than porn will ever be.
2nd i know as many women who like porn as men do. Porn "turns on both men and women" so any women who thinks she is not enough for her man because watching a sex tape turns her man on well get over it. If sex can't turn you on you are a cold fish anyway and that women needs to lighten up.
3rd. pornography has been around for the last 40+ years and it did not come out of nowhere. There are so much more things to rant and rave about in this world today. This will hardly be the downfall of this great democracy in America, in fact pornography is the essance of why we have a free society.
4th Pornography does not lead to a life of crime. You just never know who is watching this either, could be your preacher could be your teacher, could be your President, watching Porn, point is normal people watch porn and in a free society you will never stop it. Get over it its no big deal.
First Anonymous, I've realllly want to do a blog on human trafficking and have been mulling it around in my head for quite some time. But, it's just such an in-depth and strong conviction of mine that I have a hard time streamlining my thoughts into a concise essay. Ugh! It shall present itself, soon, I hope.
Jack, you are right. Most women DO partake in porn because they want to. That doesn't make it any better. And you are also right in regards to the girlie magazines- which is why I don't read them very often. They do make me feel slightly less than- and it's a feeling I loathe.
Last Anonymous- I'm sorry that you are such a fan of something so diabolical and dirty.
Wow. I loved this blog and agree 100%. I am so amazed at what your anonymous blogger has to say. To me, it is complete idiocy to think that pornography is not destructive. Granted, there are many different levels one can be at, but that it is no big deal, is a very base thing to say. In my opinion. I agree, Glamour magazines are comletly distructive to womens self esteem ALONG with porn. The perception is comlpetly screwed up.
I have to question this above statement that "pornography is the essence of why we have a free society". Wow. If I had to guess, the person who wrote this is already polluted with pornography. Sexual gratification has been the downfall of all great sociceties ...The Roman Empire being a great example. God forbid that Americas essence of freedom be pornagraphy. Our sodiers would gasp at such a statement.
Pornography pollutes the mind and the soul, and the heart of America, our marriages, our women, and, Yes, our leaders.
Tell me this is NO BIG DEAL....
You say pornography is destructive, but yet you give no examples of this destruction.
Only reason Pornography is an essance of freedom is because you cannot create laws in a free society based on one person's morals. Our sodiers are fighting for that this very minute. Our sodiers fight for all of our freedoms not just the ones you think is "just". Gambling you could argue is just as destructive or more destructive than pornography, yet this also flourishes in a free society.
Roman Empire collapsed not because they were sexually premiscuious, but Rome fell because they tried to control and police the entire world, unlike what America is doing today trying to be the police force of the world, but this is for another debate.
In a free society porn has as much right as your local video shop. When people start policing our freedoms is when our great society will fall, it is these freedoms that make us such a strong nation.
Again porn has such a small impact on society as a whole it goes unnoticed because it is no big deal.
Sexual gratification is human nature and I doubt any great society collapses because of sexual gratification.
anonymous you are so wrong! pornography nearly ended my marriage. it can become an all consuming addiction that wrecks lives.i PROMISE you that it will have a massive impact on society, you can see that plainly by looking at countries like holland.maybe you aren't aware of the variety of porn available, some of it is so perverse (animals,children,orgies,s and m) and the longer we tolerate this stuff on tv magazines etc all these depraved acts will become more mainstream and acceptable.i also wanted to mention that the figures for porn stars, prostitutes and other sex workers that were sexually abused as minors is off the charts!this is in no way harmless, we need to ask ourselves how our sons will view women and how our daughters will view themselves?
I only want to point out one thing and one thing only. Although I do not agree with porn and those who do porn, who are we to put down those who choose to participate in the making of porn. I do not think that these people come to our places of work and put us down for what we choose to do. I also think that if you do not like porn then please dont look at it.
Coming from a Christian viewpoint:
I just found out at the beginning of December that my husband, whom I adore, has been hiding his pornography addiction from me for the 4 1/2 years that we've been married. I knew he struggled with it and would periodically ask how he was doing, but he was lying, all along. He found ways around it like the incognito/private search windows that web browsers have now. He used his cell phone to watch videos and look at pics because he knew I couldn't track them either of these places. I have never felt so hurt and betrayed in all my life. I wept harder than I ever have. I didn't understand why this had to happen to me, to my marriage. God is the GREAT REDEEMER! Just one month later my husband and I are closer and more intimate than we have ever been, but it was NOT easy getting here. It took total repentance on his part and some serious grace on mine. For you woman out there, Born again believers or not, read "Every Man's Battle". This book is excellent in describing why our men struggle with this sin area and why it is such an overpowering area for many of them. Know, Christian woman, that when your husband or boyfriend looks at porn, it is NOT a reflection of how he wishes you to be. It's simply an indulgence of the flesh. This in NO way excuses this act, but please try to understand that, for many men, it doesn't mean he wants you to be that woman. For woman who know men that are desperate to stop indulging this area of their lives, look into "Covenant Eyes". Google it and you'll find a link to a wonderful accountability website that can download software to your/their computer and tracks EVERYTHING and sends weekly email accountability updates to people of their/your choosing. He doesn't have to live in the dark anymore. My husband was FET UP with living in the dark. He thought that his addiction to porn was separate from the rest of his life, from his marriage to me, from his fathering his boys. But it's simply not. It ties itself into everything because it invites the spirit of anxiety, fear, mistrust, doubt, and deception into the home. It effects everyone around him. That is what he needs to understand. My self image and confidence with who God has made me is better now than it has been since the day I started living under my husbands roof. I didn't understand why, when I was finally married to the man of my dreams (and he remains that) I became to insecure with how I looked and who I was. Satan was in constant attack mode because my husband was leaving the door WIDE open for him. Through tireless prayer, endless hours of talking through the issue, many many tears and continuing devotional time together we are on the road to full recovery. Both he and I know that it will be a LONG time before I am able to fully trust him again, but with the grace of our creator, we will get there. Do not, men OR women, be fooled into thinking this is a harmless recreational activity. It totally destroys what God intended sex to be, sacred for marriage and the single most intimate thing that a man and woman can share together. Sex is the beginning of EVERYTHING, and when we taint it and pervert it, it ties itself into EVERY part of our and our loved ones lives.
It seems to me that there are so many rabbit trails that can be taken here. And some are becoming so heated. Our writer spoke to the subject of molestation, rape, human trafficking, things that are forced upon an indidual. Rights that are stolen away from you. I didnt read here that Pornography should be illegal, but that it pollutes and shapes the mind the mind. Yes, this has been proven over and over again. Google it. Google Ted Bundy and see what it was for him. I do not believe that every person who watches porn becomes bad. It is a doorway. Some go very far. Some dont.
If I was doing something that was not good for me, and my friend made me aware, hopefully I would begin to ask why? instead of becoming defensive for my rights. Some things are just not good for us, and sometimes we need boundaries. I tell my toddler not to run into the street because "you could die!" Yes, I agree that the government should not impose things upon us...I personally hate the seatbelt rule. I should be able to choose for my self. But there is a very strong argument why I should wear one! I might die!
I have to wonder if those that are defensive or are for porn, if their life has been touched by this. Mine has, in many forms! It can become horrible. Be careful, is all that is left for me to say...it is a slippery slope.
This is to the anonymous who said he 100% disagrees with the blog and to the anonymous who is insinuating that pornography dosn't bring destruction. A little while ago porn was illegal and no where near as accessable as it is today. At the moment child pornography is illegal, but still very accessable. Its very probable that someway down the line this will become legal, maybe governed but legal. Standards of decency are continuosly slipping and have reached a sickening state where now you cannot feel safe with leaving your children in nurseries because of societies depravity and the gut turning stories we now regularly here. Recently I heard of an 11 year old boy looking at child pornography with babies involved. Imagine if that was your son. Children can access porn too easily on the internet. Porn is an addiction which in some, not everybody but some, escalates causing the person watching to watch more and more depraved filth until it becomes horrific. I heard on the radio recently that there was a support line for children who was, or had been abused to speak to someone. over 40% of the callers were from adults who were addicted to child pornography but wanted to stop this addiction. I beleive its pretty safe to say that a large percentage of them adults who called, would have never had this sickening addiction if this 'freedom' which society have the option to indulge in called pornography was so easily accessable. To you who are sounding like advocats for this 'freedom', who states that you cannot create laws based on one persons morals. To bring our soldiers into this discussion with your week argument is distasteful and disrespectful. OK where are your morals? What is the morals of peodaphiles, rapists, and so on, maybe we should just let it all go, or is there certain morals that should be upheld? It is very obvious that this worlds standards are slipping. I am by no means a saint, some people would question my standards and morals but this is a no brainer. I hope that none of my children have to face the struggles Ive had and dont continuously have sex thrown at them where ever they look. Stop talking foolishness!
This is to the dear woman who has stood by her husband no matter what he found himself into! To me, that is what God is about. He came to save the World and not to condemn. I so appreciate your willingness to show your husband grace and a helping hand instead of bitterness and disrespect. Each and everyone of us can find ourselves in the worst of places and doing the things that we never dreamed we would. You are a true soul mate, to help him and love him, and show him mercy. You will have an extra jewel in your crown. He will bring beauty out of those ashes and the blessing will far outweigh the pain., because you belong to THE KING!
PART 1
I very much agree with all you’ve said except on your blog except for the naïve fool called, “Anonymous”. His factually unsupported philosophical approach in support of the ubiquitous porn industry and its labyrinth of rituals, is to say the least, the song of fools. Having been to law enforcement’s sex crime schools and having arrested a good number of sex offenders in my 15 years of law enforcement, not to mention globe trotting the earth in search of victims snared in the human trafficking crimes, I can unequivocally say, that porn is a nucleolus, a true bedrock, in deviant sexual behavior.
The longevity studies conducted by the FBI’s sexual crime stats units which draws from state agencies throughout the USA and in other first world countries, has overwhelming supportive facts about the porn industry and the highly persuasive effect it has on over 99.7% of criminally convicted sexual offenders. In fact, at the core of the criminal’s thinking, pornography played one of the strongest motivational tools and as a reinforcement tool for criminally deviant sexual behavior in convicted sexual offenders. The entrenching of pornographic imagery as a motivational factor is second only to the actually experience. As a result, very few prisons today have come up with an effective rehab programs for such sexual offenders, and once such offenders are released having served their time or are released on parole, they instinctively return to the habit of porn which starts the cycle in them all over again.
Rarely has any sexual offender ever said that pornography is altogether absent in their life. Conversely, nearly all have admitted to the fact that pornography played a key roll in their fantasy which nurtured certain concepts and ideologies that ultimately led on a quest for an experience. Unfortunately, few offenders realized that deviant behavior (unless intercepted by some persuading factor) is progressive.
In all cases of recent child abductions where the kidnappers were arrested, such kidnappers readily admitted they were influenced by pornography until the lines of fantasy and reality were blurred, thus yielding a justified act by the continual dulling of the moral conscience. This isn’t to say that pornography was responsible for the inception of the deviant behavior, but there is no question that it played a major role in the furtherance of the behavior. In brief, pornography became the feeding trough where the offenders often returned to feed their fantasy and their habits.
According to the FBI profiles, 73% of habitual practicing voyeurs (peeping Toms) will eventually commit a murder because they become so engrossed in their fantasy and blur the lines between that and reality until the conscience is compromised in the fantasy and the act is ultimately committed. Of those 73% percent that have been caught, 100% admitted to pornography being a major influence in their lives.
Bundy, who slaughtered over 30 women because of his uncontrolled sexual deviance, admitted that pornography was the major influence in his life which took him on a journey of fantasy where he acted out such fantasies.
100% of all serial sexual offenders admitted that pornography played a major influencing role in their lives. Often their domiciles were cluttered with volumes of pornography and in some cases where the offenders taped their crimes, they continually replayed the pornographic scenes.
Is pornography harmful? Solid unbiased stats collected by criminal agencies all over the world attest to the same basic conclusions that pornography is not only harmful to a society, but in many cases, deadly to the individual.
So…Mr. Anonymous, do your home work. Return from Disneyland where fantasies are for the naive and for those caught up living in a world of make-believe. But here on planet earth, porn is dangerous, humiliating, disgusting, and plays a major role in the deterioration of a society. (Continue to part 2.)
PART 2
Now, for Mr. Anonymous’ quotes:
1. 1st Glamour Magazines gives women a false sense of perfection.
Correction: Uh…no more than standing in a garage makes a person a car. There is a difference between magazines calculated toward beauty trends and superficiality and people following their base primal urges which are shaped by the sources they learn from.
2. 2nd I know as many women who like porn as men do. Porn "turns on both men and women" so any women who thinks she is not enough for her man because watching a sex tape turns her man on well get over it. If sex can't turn you on you are a cold fish anyway and that women needs to lighten up.
Correction: That would depend on the vein of life you’re living, and the kind of people you hang with, which, in this case, seems to mirror your philosophical beliefs. In fact, the actual numbers are substantially lower with women than men. Over 50% of men participate in Internet porn while only 30% of women do, and of that 30%, fewer are recidivistic. The reflection of your values as profiled in your rant, leave no doubt that you are a habitual porn watcher likely incubating deviant fantasies, which, left unchecked, have extreme volatility to them. Get some help now! If your philosophy has any merit, it reveals the values you embrace.
3. 3rd. pornography has been around for the last 40+ years and it did not come out of nowhere. There are so much more things to rant and rave about in this world today. This will hardly be the downfall of this great democracy in America, in fact pornography is the essence of why we have a free society.
Correction: More accurately stated, porn has been around for thousands of years albeit as hand drawn pictures. However, the severity and frequency of sexual crime has paralleled the rise of porn in tempo with the availability of it on the Internet. To give you a little grace here, pornography is not the essence of our free society. I think you meant that the 1st Amendment Rights (which entails freedoms of speech, religion, and the press) is the essence of a free society to print what it chooses. But even that has limitations. Obviously (hopefully), child porn does not fall within the scope of your feeble reasoning. If you think the essence of freedom in America is based on pornography, give it a te4st run and you’ll soon find yourself in Cell Clock “C” as the queen of the state pen. Even the general population of hardened criminals don’t put up with certain kinds of porn. In fact, a vast majority of the porn industry has been traced back to organized crime. Opps…that one got overlooked, didn’t it?
4. 4th Pornography does not lead to a life of crime. You just never know who is watching this either, could be your preacher could be your teacher, could be your President, watching Porn, point is normal people watch porn and in a free society you will never stop it. Get over it its no big deal.
Correction: Try posting porn pictures of your girlfriend across your cell phone network and see how the 1st Amendment Rights kick in; they don’t. You’ll find yourself standing in front of a judge being sentenced to prison. Try child porn. Just having it on your computer will land you a minimum of five years in a federal pen. (Continue to part 3.)
PART 3
Does porn lead to a life of crime? Hmm. Maybe you should ask Ed Gein: he skinned his victims, exhumed corpses, and decorated his home with parts of his victims’ bodies. Human skin was used to make dust bins, furniture, and even clothes. Or John Wayne Gacy: Gacy lured his victims into handcuffs in the pretext of showing them a pair of trick handcuffs he used in his clown act. He’d then dare the youth to free themselves. Once the boys were handcuffed, he would use either a rope or a board across their throats to kill them while he raped them. Or Ted Bundy: Before his execution, he revealed that his addiction to pornography led him to do what he did. He said that there are many people out there who were addicted and nothing is being done about them. Or Jeffrey Dahmer: This Milwaukee serial killer murdered boys of Asian and African descent. His murders were gruesome and involved torture, forced sodomy, dismemberment (removing their limbs), necrophilia, and cannibalism. Or Gary Ridgway: “I hate most prostitutes. I did not want to pay them for sex. I also picked prostitutes as victims because they were easy to pick up without being noticed. I knew they would not be reported missing right away, and might never be reported missing.” These were the words of one of the worst slayers in American history, who was said to have killed more women than any other serial killer. Or. Albert Fish: Albert Fish may have been America’s most vile pedophile, serial killer, and cannibal. He is known by many names — Gray Man, Brooklyn Vampire, The Boogeyman, and the Werewolf of Wysteria. He was a gentle-looking and benevolent grandfather, a total contrast to the monster within him. His wife considered him a wonderful husband and his children believed he was a model father. Some of his crimes seem unbelievable.
In each case, pornography proved to be an influencing factor. I could go on with more, but the point that pornography does not lead to crime is fractionally true with a certain percentage of the population, but never true when one factors in the influence it has in the perpetuity of criminal behaviors in the above individuals. Sorry, O Brave Anonymous One, the stats on porn contradict everything you embrace in your feeble philosophy that it is absent and separated from crime. In fact, it plays a major factor in deviant sexual behavior, much of which is a crime.
The truth is, we do legislate social morals and pornography is one of them: no one under 18 can be displayed in any porn movie; no one under the age of 18 can legally purchase porn. Wonder why? We legislate public drunkenness, drunk driving, public indecent exposure, lying (try that with a cop or in court), we have hate crimes, crimes that forbid stealing; disturbing the peace, and the list goes on and on. It’s all moral based legislation.
So…Mr. Anonymous, do your home work. Return from Disneyland where fantasies are for the naive and for those caught up living in a world of make-believe. But here on planet earth, porn is dangerous, humiliating, disgusting, and plays a major role in the deterioration of a society.
The end.
Dear ex law enforcement person, Porn does not equate to sexual crimes the same as guns to do not lead to violence. A person who is normal can own a gun and not want to commit a crime. A normal person cou;ld easily watch porn and not want to commit a crime.
Could it be just possible that those human beings that are not of sound mind can watch porn and react the wrong way, so it is not porn that leads someone to commit a sexual act, the person would do it regardless of whether he had porn or not.
Do you think rapes only happened after porn was invented? Don't be naive. Guns don't kill people people kill people, porn does not make people commit sexual acts, an unstable mind makes someone commit a sexual act.
In a free society you cannot make this illigal because where does it stop. Maybe next the watching the Simpsons will make people eat more donuts so we must not allow people to watch the Simpsons. Where does it end.
Whether you like porn or not you are stuck with it. You have a choice not to turn it on. If you do not want porn in your society well there is China you can move to or North Korea, Saudia Arabia, Iran. You do have choices.
and to quote you mr or mrs ex officer "But here on planet earth, porn is dangerous, humiliating, disgusting, and plays a major role in the deterioration of a society"
Porn or watching porn is not dangerous,I never heard of one case where a man or women was shot dead watching porn, watching porn is not humiliating(maybe if you have reasons to be humilated), nor is sex, yes that happens in porn is not disgusting (when did sex ever become disgusting it is part of human nature get over it) and has very little to do with the detrioation of society. Trying to limits ones freedom could and would lead to the deterioation of society.
"Pornography victimizes women and children": I think you'd be hard pressed to find anyone that think women (or anyone) should be forced into doing porn. Are there women doing porn that wish they were doing something else? Absolutely - there are also women waiting tables that hate it, that feel degraded doing it, that would rather be doing anything else, but simply can't afford to leave their job. Should we outlaw waitressing? There are also a large number of women that truly enjoy doing porn, even though you can't conceive of such a thing (just as there are women who enjoy being cops, miners, accountants and taxidermists, even if you wouldn't). And I'm absolutely certain that nearly everyone, from bible-thumping puritans to hardcore porn producers, would agree that children should not be involved in pornography in any way. There's laws against that sort of thing you know.
"Pornography causes an unrealistic view of 'perfection'": You know who I feel sorry for? Policemen. And no, I don't mean "police persons", I mean policeMEN. How many times do cops have to go to a movie with a spouse or significant other to watch John McClane, Dirty Harry, or Riggs & Murtaugh, and know that they can't measure up to these men. What about those poor doctors who have to come home to wives watching "House", knowing that she can't help but think he's just not as smart, as clever (and dare I saw, as handsome) as Dr. Gregory House, M.D. Movies, television and pornography aren't meant to represent reality exactly as it is - they're fantasy, they're escapism, they're meant to entertain and excite, to get the blood pumping and the mind racing. Just as an emotionally griping drama might inspire someone down a career path, might porn not also inspire a husband and wife to try something new in the bedroom, perhaps pumping new life into their dying relationship and preventing a bitter, sad, sinful divorce?
"Pornography is the root of all sexual crime": Um... well, as you state, you have no proof, this is just an opinion. Which, of course, you are entitled to, and being a avid reader of your blog, I'm positive (without having any proof) that there is no way I will change your mind. But in the event there are some readers of your blog with a more open mind: perhaps Sazaran's experience are the result of a CORELATION, not a CAUSATION. Is it not conceivable that individuals prone to sexual violence would be attracted to pornography? Would it not make sense that these individuals are also drawn to violent movies, weapons, and dark alleys. Rather than outlaw porn, maybe we should outlaw television violence, knives, and require all alleyways have sufficient lighting.
"Pornography perverts the mind set": Have you done a poll of people who's minds were in the gutter, to figure out what percentage of them were porn-watchers? Ideally you would have to gauge both the level of their in-the-gutterness, and the amount of porn they watch, in order to truly discover if there was a correlation between the watching of pornography and dirty-mindedness. And I'm sure you are sharp enough to have caught that horrid word again, "correlation", because that's exactly what you would be discovering with your little poll. To figure out if watching porn actually caused people's thoughts to take a turn for the colorful, you would need to take some very clean-minded individuals and subject them to hours of celluloid debauchery to see what effect it had on them. Actually, this sounds like an amazing experiment - let me know, I'd love to help you set it up!
"Pornography is expensive": So are fine chocolates, fast cars, movie theater popcorn and internet access; in this economy, we should stop spending on anything that's not absolutely required for survival. You know, unless we actually want there to be a recovery.
To be continued....
"Pornography intensifies an individual's drive to serve oneself, rather than serve others": As you may have guessed (and you may well have, you're a very astute individual), I have been known to watch porn, so I will let my mind sink into the gutter for just a second here. Let me tell you, there is nothing hotter than going down on a girl and driving her to insane ecstasy, using techniques gathered while watching porn. So while the image flashing in your (very dirty) head is of some brute sitting in front of his computer, "servicing" himself to some internet porn, that is not the end-all be-all effect of pornography.
To some of the other posters:
gg: Sorry to hear that pornography nearly ended your marriage - though I doubt it was just pornography. Was it perhaps the fact that you kept it secret from your spouse, the fact that you couldn't talk to them about it because it had such a stigma attached to it because of views similar to those espoused by Sazaran? Regarding "Holland" (I assume you are referring to the Netherlands, the whole country, and not simply a portion of it), they have a lower rate of murder (http://www.nationmaster.com/graph/cri_mur_percap-crime-murders-per-capita), rape (http://www.nationmaster.com/graph/cri_rap_percap-crime-rapes-per-capita), and fewer divorces (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Divorce_demography) than the US.
PDK: SO much I could tackle, I'll stick with the crime topic though. 1) If you let me take naked pictures of you, and I post them on the internet, you have no legal recourse - this act is entirely legal (if astoundingly unethical, and I haven't seen anywhere here put forth this act as "ok"). 2) No one is saying child porn is okay. 3) Ed Gein, John Wayne Gacy, Ted Bundy: Are you saying they were all normal individuals, and were turned into the monsters they became because of watching pornography? If that's the case, I'm astounded that the $10 billion porn industry hasn't left our country rampant with serial killers. I mean, if that were the case, 1/10 of the population would be out to murder, rape, and eat you, and not necessarily in that order.
So I guess in summary: yes, porn is a very hotly debated topic. Does child pornography exist? Yes. Should it? No, and every forward-thinking country rightly has laws against it. Are there women in porn that were sexually abused as children? Yes, just as there are women in porn who had perfect, happy childhoods; conversely, there are abused women who are judges, cops, prostitutes, kick boxers and therapists - childhood trauma can lead people down all sorts of different paths. Claiming that porn is evil in each and every case, in all manner of being, and despicable to its very core, is as silly as claiming that alcohol will surely lead someone to alcoholism and they'll murder children with their drunk driving, as silly as going to church will surely lead someone to strapping on a vest of dynamite and blowing up a building (or initiate a 200-year campaign of slaughter to restore The Holy Land).
Ron, Ron, Ron (THE Ron Jeremy?!?!?! Now I am impressed), you needed to have read PDK's response more carefully. If 50% of males have participated in the indulgence of internet porn, then 50% of the population of males is on a path to being rapists and/or serial killers and/or canibals, not the 10% of the population you cite. Tsk tsk. Your math and/or reading skills disappoint me.
Now, like 100% of all other cross-dressing serial-killers killers, I shall pursue sleep and/or the consumption of water and/or the consumption of calories to sustain myself. OMG!!! They sleep and eat, and I sleep and eat, so I must be... BECOMING ONE OF THEM!!!! NOooooooooo....
do not assume that you know anything about my marriage except what i mentioned. you are so wrong i am a women who's husband was addicted to pornography which wrecked my self esteem. similarly to another women who commented i gave him grace and forgiveness again again only to find my trust betrayed. a marriage cannot exist without trust.because i loved my husband i tried to watch porn with him and make it a "couple thing" pornography is self serving and is so easy to get into that i contemplated working in the industry and had some pictures taken and published. we took the beautiful marriage God had blessed us with and turned into something so terrible we barely suervived. the thing that saved us was giving our marriage to God he healed us in every way. we have a greatmarriage and amazing sex life and no longer have any shame or mistrust in our relationship.when your marriage is in that much trouble only our father in heaven can heal and restore and set us free!my husband still has to be guarded about the things he looks at listens to etc but he is free and i cannot describe the joy he now has.ron jeremy do not begin to teach me in your condescending manner about holland and the netherlands, i lived there for 4 years dickhead!i know all about the problems pornography has had on not just holland but many other european countries which have much more lax laws on pornography. you want to hear of a place being destroyed by these things? ha try soddom and gomorrah!
Need to apologize. My kid posted under my name and was lippy 'bout it. Smart kid, talks with a bit more sarcasm than he ought sometimes. We had a discussion about using someone else's name.
- Harley
To pdk
you state "Over 50% of men participate in Internet porn while only 30% of women do,"
if this is true, and lets say there are 100 million male adults in america, 50 million men and 30 million women watch porn on a regular basis. If Porn leads to sexual crimes how come the % of people committing sex crimes isnt around 80% of the adult population. If 80% of the adult population watches porn and porn leads to sexual crimes wouldn't 80% of the adult population be behind bars right now?
Is it just possible the Ted Bundy's and others you mentioned were just mentally retarted or a mental dosorder and it had nothing to do with porn? Porn is an instrument or tool, it cannot lead to violence or sex crimes, only individuals can commit crimes, not porn. How many ted bundys also watched leave it to beaver groing up? or happy days..... watching something on a screen that is not real does not equate to violence in real life. People commit crimes and these crimes would be committed whether there was porn or not.
I suppose people watching vampire movies can then go out and become vampires.... lmao in your logic that would be a reasonable asumption but that is not true and neither is the fact that porn equates to violencnt sex crimes.
Guns and Porn: Let’s see if we can do some comparative assimilation. I am an adamant defender of people having the right to own guns because of the criminal element that possesses them. However, the comparisons you use are abstract and disconnected. So let me use an equally annoying but fallacious premise such as you used: “Everyone who is porn addict drinks water within 24 hours, both before and after sliming over their porn. Therefore, if we take away the water, the porn will disappear. Water is the cause of porn.”
Yep…and guns don’t commit crimes; people commit crimes.” Very true. However, any criminal that employs the use of deadly force, to wit: a firearm, gets an automatically enhanced penalty. And while guns do not have a psychological inducement to commit a crime, the comparative effect of pornography is uniquely different. Drooling over porn, is psychologically different that drooling over a gun. A gun has no inducing euphoric psychological correlation to innate sexual bodily functions that trigger behavior compelling one’s self in a quest to an experience.
Contrary to lame the opinions which are as factually based as Pre-Columbus navigators who insisted that the world is flat, multiple studies on the effect of pornography shows that in fact, pornography does induce criminal behavior: Michigan state police detective Darrell Pope found that of the 38,000 sexual assault cases in Michigan (1956-1979), in 41 percent of the cases pornographic material was viewed just prior to or during the crime. This agrees with research done by psychotherapist David Scott who found that “half the rapists studied used pornography to arouse themselves immediately prior to seeking out a victim.” The Final Report of the 1986 Attorney General’s Commission on Pornography lists a full chapter of testimony (197-223) from victims whose assailants had previously viewed pornographic materials. The adverse effects range from physical harm (rape, torture, murder, sexually transmitted disease) to psychological harm (suicidal thoughts, fear, shame, nightmares).
According to one study: Because pornography is one-sided, only one person receiving satisfaction, the emotional exchange is lacking and that can lead to a void, afterwards, as pornography viewing is usually accompanied by masturbation, when viewed alone. As a result, loneliness can be accentuated, loss of self-esteem, and depression can also be initiated and augmented and the compulsion for the transition from fantasy to experience is accentuated. There are clinical studies which indicate a correlation between masturbation and depression in the context of pornographic use. [See: Sexual Functioning and Self-Reported Depressive Symptoms Among College Women by Penny Frolich and Cindy Meston, University of Texas, Austin (2003)]
Dr. Dolf Zimmerman and Dr. Jennings Bryant (U of Wis) showed that continued exposure to pornography had serious adverse effects on beliefs about sexuality in general and on attitudes toward women in particular. They also found that pornography desensitizes people to rape which gives rationalistic justification for the criminal act....
These researchers also found that massive exposure to pornography encourages a desire for increasingly deviant materials which involve violence, like sadomasochism and rape.
According to Charles Keating of Citizens for Decency Through Law, research reveals that 77 percent of child molesters of boys and 87 percent of child molesters of girls admitted to imitating the sexual behavior they had seen modeled in pornography.
Sociologists Murray Straus and Larry Baron (University of New Hampshire) found that rape rates are highest in states which have high sales of sex magazines and lax enforcement of pornography laws.
Michigan state police detective Darrell Pope found that of the 38,000 sexual assault cases in Michigan (1956-1979), in 41 percent of the cases pornographic material was viewed just prior to or during the crime. This agrees with research done by psychotherapist David Scott who found that “half the rapists studied used pornography to arouse themselves immediately prior to seeking out a victim.”
The Final Report of the 1986 Attorney General’s Commission on Pornography lists a full chapter of testimony (197-223) from victims whose assailants had previously viewed pornographic materials. The adverse effects range from physical harm (rape, torture, murder, sexually transmitted disease) to psychological harm (suicidal thoughts, fear, shame, nightmares).
Nearly 900 theaters show X-rated films and more than 15,000 “adult” bookstores and video stores offer pornographic material, outnumbering McDonald’s restaurants in the U.S. by a margin of at least three to one.
Each year, nearly 100 full-length pornographic films provide estimated annual box office sales of $50 million.
Approximately 70% of the pornographic magazines sold eventually end up in the hands of minors.
About 1.2 million children are annually exploited through child pornography and prostitution.
The final line is this: only a fool who is the star of his/her one-person-world would continue to embrace the idiocy that the chronic viewing pornography is harmless. Such people are neither interested in the true, largely because they have hidden self-serving agendas in their motivations. It does little good to enlighten them with facts. Such people are likely within the family tree of the Hale Bop groupies who made their grand exit by collective suicide in order to return to their astral plane.
i agree with everything you said!!!!!
with the actual blog that is... not all these crazies ranting and raving about porn. if you think its right, then leave us all alone! we obviously find it wrong. it has hurt marriages and lives! that clearly means its not a good thing. so maybe the people who like it should go watch it and get pleasure from NOTHING. you are only pleasuring your self and that seems quite selfish to me. sex was made for the purpose of two people to pleasure each other. not two people to get taped while have sex so they could make a bunch of people horny to touch themselves.
First off, I don't totally disagree with you. There are some bad aspects to porn. Some horrible, but you are looking at this a little one sided. I will admit I watch porn on occasion WITH my husband, and I don't hate it. Actually, I enjoy it. There is porn out there that isn't total fantasy, physical scenes. It has brought a new flare to our sex life. We don't NEED it, but it is fun on occasion. There is something about porn that enables us to express a little more of ourselves that we are a little too shy to do without it. Someone doing the moaning for us somehow can make it a little more intense. Anyway, I just think you are looking only at the bad. There are marriages out there enjoy some decent porn in the privacy of their bedrooms, between two totally in love people. And I know it isn't just at my house! Porn gave our sex life the boost it needed to keep and grow a happy, HEALTHY marriage.
As with anything, familiarity becomes over-familiar. If porn is what excites you in your marriage, then what will you do when the level of your viewing pleasure demands and "one-level-up"? The marriage bed is personal and you've a right to express it as you wish within legal limits. However, be prepared to deal with the idea of needing to stoke the fires after the new thing becomes mundane. On that note, are you prepared to deal with the possibilities of activates you are repetitively exposed to, which, at this time, some of which you may be currently ruling out. Fact: porn is highly volatile, and it takes you on a journey with an incalculable ending. The proof of this, is that you are now engaged in an activity that you would have never considered previously. Today’s “new thing” is tomorrow’s “old thing” which begs for new excitement in an ever reaching horizon of experimentation. Before you know it, you’re living on the dark side of the moon. Wife swapping, 3-somes, orgies, open marriages, and the list goes on as the intoxication for new experiences continue. Good luck! Can a person carry fire in their bosom and not get burned?
Anonymous: By your own logic, we should avoid any and all interesting and exciting activities. Don't try that slice of chocolate cake; after a while you'll crave something more, chocolate cake with sugary frosting, then chocolate cake with double-layers of chocolate frosting. Before you know it, you'll be eating 10 chocolate cakes each day, become morbidly obese and DIE!
You should also avoid mountain biking; the thrill of racing down the mountain won't last long, and before you know it you'll be racing down steeper and more dangerous trails, until one day you choose one that's too hard and you'll DIE!
Not everything has to be turned up to 11; people can enjoy the occasional slice of cake without becoming overeaters; people can take up new sports and hobbies without pushing them to their potentially dangerous extremes; people can watch pornography without it overwhelming their life and turning them into raping, cannibalistic maniacs. Some people are capable of turning the dial up to 3 and leaving it there.
Great point (Post above me)! Porn is just like anything else. In moderation, it is ok. Extreame on either end gets to be weird! I say enjoy on occasion, especially in loving comitted marriage. If you keep anything in moderation, it never seems to be a problem. And there are TONS of people out there that use things that aren't the best for you or considered publically correct, and use them in moderation without ANY problem!
Ron, you've forgotton one thing in your attempt to rebut- chcoclate cake and mountain biking do not affect all aspects of a person (spirit, soul, body) the way sex does and was intended to do!
Alias Ron Jeremy (ARJ), (whose identity is lost in the real persona of the famous porn star, Ron Jeremy), has a logic and reasoning skill resembling something of an 80 I.Q.
It proves my point once again that you cannot reason with a fool, and even worse, a obsessive fool infatuated with his own addictions to something he has learned to justify in any extreme he can conjure up. Even a mildly intelligent person would never draw the parallels that Alias Ron Jeremy uses in total disregard to the facts and statistics out there that speak contrary to his obsession for porn, hence the use of his alias name.
I wonder: does porn drop the I.Q. of an individual? Hmmm. AJR, or for that matter, the famous porn star, Ron Jeremy, and his ilk, might be a good test case for a new psychological profile study.
Ladies, let me introduce to you Alias Ron Jeremy who models his skills after mimicking porn roles. There ya go: your new romantic lover. AJR is a man so infatuated with porn that he has honed and developed his skills in fantasyland thus arousing himself in training for you! So, ladies, is this the kind of man you want to be intimately involved with? That is, someone who envisions his porn models while he is performing on you? I sincerely hope you have more dignity than that.
Maybe all is well and quite in AJR’s world as long as he keeps his sick little secret to himself. After all, no one really knows what’s in the boiling caldron that simmers in the stew of his ever-increasing perversions. Beside’s what’s love got to do with it anyway? Right? So as Mr. AJR performs his exquisitely honed skills on you, remember, he can’t get the on-cue responses out of his head as he indexes through the imagery of his multiple porn fantasy lovers a he mimics on you what he has studiously envisioned from hour upon hour upon hour in his porn studies. Rest assured, your identity is lost in his fantasy. All he needs from you is to groan, scream, convulse, and fulfill his fantasy by your erotic reactions. What a let down for him when you fail to react like a porn star. In brief, you’re just the test-dummy that enables him to quantitatively measure his self-esteem as a man that every woman is looking for. So line up ladies, AJR is standing at stud waiting to service you. Oh. Be sure you bring tissue paper. He likely forgot to wipe the drool off his chin from last night’s tutoring session with his on-line master of porn, the real, Ron Jeremy.
Funny - I'm pretty sure someone with an IQ of 80 could probably keep their acronyms straight, especially when switching back and forth between the acronym and what it stands for. You got it right once though, so I guess that's something.
Perhaps you would like to try reasoning with me? Perhaps you could explaining why you believe my parallels are invalid; you could start with the "facts and statistics" you mentioned. I would truly love to see those. I, for one, am more than happy to admit that I can be wrong, and I certainly don't need to force my world view on anyone else (I know, how very un-Christian of me).
If not, feel free to go back to the personal attacks against me - I think they're probably more inline with what the other readers of this blog are expecting.
Ron, ARE you a Christian? Unless you are, there would be no reason to say that your preferences are "un-Christian."
You must be getting to the end of your reasoning if the only thing you had to argue against was a typo (which do not reflect I.Q. by the way).
Gonna be straight-up here. If it's the Real RJ or ARJ or whatever, I don't see much reality to the notion of the ladies linin'up for 'im. If ya look like RRJ, that is. No offense, but that's one ugly dude. Yeah, I guess you could call me superficial and all, but I'll live with that. And I'm sure Ron's ego can absorb my observation.
- Harley
PDK
All I know is you could try to place blame sexual crime on porn, when in reality if someone goes to the point where they have to comit a haneous offense as sexual assult or rape, they already have problems, could been way they grew up, parents beating them, sexually assulted, or any number of a combination of things. To blame all sexual acts on porn is just ignorant. There is not one thing that will induce someone to commit a crime like that. The person that does this is obvoius has a mental disorder and one thing like watching porn IS NOT GOING TO MAKE SOMEONE TO COMMIT RAPE. Please when someone has a mental disorder there are way too many factors that make a person commit such a horrendous act to think "porn" is the reason is just plain ignorant PDK.
So site all the police reports you want they are not Dr who still cannot figure out why these people commit these crimes. GET A CLUE.
^ There are some truths to this. However, no one blamed porn as the sole reason for sexual crime. It was only cited as, in my words, "a common denominator" or one of the many contributing factors. Go back in any perpetrators past and I bet they watched porn habitually.
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