Random Ramblings

(Dandelion Herd, by Me)

I want to write. Like, reallyreallyreallyreally bad. In the former days, I wrote a lot. I have binders full of my short stories and such and I have so many ideas now. But, I can’t choose one to concentrate on and put down on paper. Imagine the scene from Harry Potter- where they’re in a room full flying keyes, looking for the one with the golden ribbon that can unlock the door they want to go through. That’s me. In my head. I have all of these fickle, flittery ideas and no magic, flying broom to catch the one I want. So, I guess I’ll just stick to posting random thoughts on my blog. *hugs all our readers* thanks for being my fan-base!! :)

(Down By The Depot, by Me)

Geez, man, my son is getting so big! Where does time go? I mean, I understood it when other mommies told me they grow up too fast- but this is ridiculous! One whole year; 365 days; 8,760 hours and 52,560 (give or take 1,000) diapers later…

(Baby Steps, by Me)
I hate change. Really, I do. The little changes are okay: hair color, room décor, jobs. But, no major life rearrangement. They’re a different story. As the time for our move gets closer, I’m becoming more anxious- in an unnerving way. I really am excited to leave this place- but not all of my beautiful, kind and entertaining friends (all of my friends employ each quality, I haven’t grouped them into categories. ;-)). I don’t want to start over and have to re-establish myself with strangers. I do not want to put Malachi in day care and pay another woman to raise my son. I do not want to change these things in my life, because they are the most important.
Its my lucky day: walking home from the mall (we live across the street from it) my dad found a CUTE Guess handbag laying on the ground. He brought it home and now it’s mine! Don’t worry, people, there was no information inside of it that would let me look for the owner. No wallet or ID of any kind. Just a camera and a few anatomy flash cards. It’s pretty. I heart it. :) So, yes, guess I would have to say that if I found a load of money on the side of the road... I would keep it and not hunt down the owner. Hey, blessings come in all packages. ;-)

Rase and I watched The Curious Case of Benjamin Button last night. I both liked it and was a little distrubed by it. There’s something about seeing a baby die of “old age” that doesn’t settle right with me. But, the movie people did an amazing job of making Brad Pitt and Cate Blanchette (can you get any prettier than Cate?! I don’t think so!!!) look both very young and very old. Special effects are jaw-dropping these days. Anyway, it got me to thinking: what if other weird things happened for humans? Like, what if our ears grew like our fingernails and we had to trim or clip them? And people who really let themselves “go” would have long, floppy ears? Yes, these are the things that go through my head.

I’ve not, yet, begun to wean mah boy. I’m not ready and neither is he. When I was at my mom’s house, I experimented by cutting back a couple feedings and he flipped. My vacation turned into a 24 hour cry fest. Well, not 24 hours, I guess. I did get about 7 hours of sleep each night. But, during the day, when he had had enough dirt to eat, he wanted to nurse. My weaning totally backfired- he became even more clingly and wanted to nurse twice as often as before. I think those are pretty clear signs that he isn’t comfortable enough to let go. And, frankly, neither am I. I’ve had such a nice 19 months of PMS-less days and eating whatever I want. I was so concentrated on getting Malachi ready that I totally overlooked own mental and emotional preparation. :-\

Regarding the whole Jon & Kate Plus 8 frenzy that the media has stirred up: I feel bad for the Gosselin family. The media has taken a normal issue (husband v. wife) and blown it so out of proportion. I do think that Kate is wound a little too tight. I do think that she needs to let Jon wear the pants in the family. But, I also think that people need not be so critical of their relationship or decision to continue with their show. They have eight children and they have done what they can do to provide for their kids and give them a life that most families of multiples do not get. Every married couple goes through a time when they re-think their decision to marry (and have kids), that does not make either of them “monsters”. I really, truly hope that Jon and Kate can get Christian counseling to save their marriage and their family’s happiness/security.

SO, I was just fired from my j-o-b, today (I'll admit, without going into detail, that I was at fault). I'm both relieved and angry. I shall vent. Not once in my entire life have I been treated so poorly at a place of employment (not even when I worked for ProActiv and didn't get paid for one whole month), experienced such two-faced people, or been fired! Seriously, okay, I know that Nomz works for the same company- but, really, she doesn't. Her boss is actually cool and on her side when it comes to the sticky situations. My boss(es) have no backbone. They don't stand up for their employees. From the very first day I started working at STP, I dealt with ridiculous issues that belonged only in junior high. I wrestled with bureaucratic bitches and politcal pettiness. They claim to be a simple and fair mom-and-pop business. Gag me. They are so corporate it's not even funny. It's not how well you perform your job there, it's who you know. The owner flaunts his salvation like a banner and then treats his employees (not directly, I know, but indirectly) as if he's never heard of Jesus. I could go onnnnnn and onnnnnn but this blog wasn't supposed to be dramatic. I'd like to remind those of *you* that fired me... what goes around comes around and even if it was my fault, where you have not shown mercy; you will not receive mercy. Neener, neener. Okay, I'm done.

(this picture wasn't taken by me. Find it here)