I have only a few things up in this head of mine, and rather than creating and overwhelming you with an entire post of my scattered thoughts, I'm going to whine about only three of them. Please read, and discuss. It's like homework, only more like therapy. And I'm getting the therapy from you guys for free.
Point 1:
I miss my friends.
I mean, I've still got all of them for the most part. Heck, I've got one girl back in my life from *gulp* 20 years ago, thanks to the book of face! The rest of them are scattered all over the state of Wyoming, and some others in different parts of the country. The point really isn't that I don't have any friends, because my friends are amazing, and still part of my daily life.
BUT. I miss having friends that are five seconds away should there be a friend disaster, an immediate excuse for a good time, or just to meet for a quick bite at the last minute. It's part of the repercussions of me moving away, and I was fully prepared for it...I think. I'm actually fine, until the feeling of loneliness sneaks up from behind. Example: I was at the bar the other night with my favorite man, hanging with some really cool people...and I realized that I missed SORELY the friends that would normally be there with me. There are two of you, in particular, that would have seen me from across the bar, and known by the look on my face what I was thinking, what I wanted to drink, and exactly what song I was thinking we needed to dance to. Le Sigh. I know it will come in good time, and I still had a blast, but I miss you.
Conclusion: I still have friends that are a mere phone call away. I still have friends that are actively part of my daily life, via phone, Facebook, text message, picture message, or even within an hour's drive. I'll make new friends, sure enough. I've got a good habit of that. And no matter how far away I move, or how close I am in vicinity to them, loneliness will always join me occasionally.
Point 2:
Weddings.
This is not about my past marriage, my next marriage, or my lack of marriage. This is just in general. Ah hem.
I love being friends with blushing, gushing brides. I've never been one to get envious, or feel that "always a bridesmaid, never a bride." feeling. I have, however, stood behind one or two, and noticed a few things.
#1. People take for granted how much time, effort, and lack of sleep goes in to these things.
#2. People have a terrible habit of making them about them, and not the bride and groom.
#3. You only get cake if you play nice. So stop playing not nice.
Conclusion: Planning them, is MUCH bigger than any of them expect. And while they think, or even tell you that they don't need your help, they're lying. They usually feel like they're absolutely drowning in their own bliss, and true that it may be that it IS bliss, and that they want to do it all themselves to make sure it gets done right, they're extremely overwhelmed. If all you do is sit and watch them make things happen, you're going to see some peace come in to the picture.
If you're in the wedding party, if you're related to the bride or groom, or if you're a best friend that's just getting a front row seat...it is your absolute DUTY to make sure that day goes off without a hitch (well...one hitch, get it, get it?!). You're there to support that love, you're there to comfort them, and you're supposed to be there for them every second of the planning stages, regardless of how "not a big deal" you think each step is, or how disconnected you think you are from the planning, or even how Bridezilla she's actually getting. I mean hi, she's dropping at least $6000, just to put on a show for YOU people to watch her take the next step. You do realize that your ticket to the show is free, right? Pamper the hell out of her.
Conclusion Part 2: I'm never planning a wedding.
Point 3:
I want to do everything.
I want to have a job doing Facebook. I want to waitress. I want to ride and train horses. I want to work in a retail store. I want to teach English. I want to work with special needs children. I want to be a vet. And it really bothers me that because I've changed rank in my "title" or pay, that people are assuming I'm settling for less than I deserve, or making poor choices.
Conclusion: I can't be everything, but there is absolutely nothing stopping me from trying everything once.
So, there you go. A massive rant about Things. I need therapy.
Yours Truly,
Nomz
Wednesday, September 29, 2010
Random Discussions (RD): Part I
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3 comments:
We miss you toooooo! Having you a part of my/our every day 'chats', was wonderful. We snarked, we loved, we bounced songs of of each other, we solved family & friend drama - we were just there. Always. So p.s., can't wait till you are there again! ;)
And, whatever you decide to do with your new life, career-wise, take your time. Do a little of this and a little of that. Your dream job will come along in its on sweet time. Enjoy your free time, decorate your new home, cherish your man and kiss your girls all the time.
Finally, your choices are YOUR choices and no one elses. PERIOD.
Love ya girl!
Great post, Naomi. Not authorized to give therapy but I'm opinionated...does that count? As someone involved in "weddings", thank you, thank you, thank you for writing this. We're all there to celebrate the bride and the groom. Period. Let's pay attention during the ceremony, during toasts, the first dance, etc. It's a party, a free ticket to an amazing party, but let's remember WHY we're there and WHAT we're celebrating. *steps down from soap box*
I'm taking a quick second away from building an altar (get it? ALTAR? MARRIAGE?! ALTAR AHAHAHAHHA) in your honor to say thank you.
Because (1) you know me so well it's like you can see into my head and (2) you get this whole "wedding" thing. Sometimes I feel like people forget that, hey, it does kind of have to be about the bride & groom sometimes; it's not just this giant event where there's cake, a really pretty dress and a dance-fest after the fact. It's two people's lives changing, together, and when people who should be a huge part of it are like *shrugs, wanders off until forced to participate*, it sucks. It's like they're telling you, "Sorry, you're not important; but hey, call me when the party starts."
Adore your face off (well, only partially, since omg that'd look creepy in the pictures NEXT WEEKEND... next weekend, ohmygod) & thank you, thank you, thank you for being my big, loud voice <3
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